//LETTERSTOGOD.

LDR - Long Distance Relationship, who said it's not even worth a try.

2012-01-22T12:42:00.005+08:00

Distance is not for the fearful, it is for the bold. It's for those who are willing to spend a lot of time a lone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It's for those knowing a good thing when they see it, even if they don't see it nearly enough.

Everyday, on this particular planet called earth. Millions and millions of people have no choice but to deal with being miles apart from their loved ones. To be true, some people think it's downright absurd and bound for a break up sooner or later.

But not for me. I often find long distance relationship as a challenge. There's always some certain advantage being miles apart from your loved ones. Only some people fails to see it. But again, depends on your own way of making it positive instead of always thinking it as something bad. If you're willing to take the risk, go on. Maintain the long distance relationship you're facing and prove anybody who thought that it won't work out.

As what they always say, distance makes the heart grows fonder. I often have this thought in my head, the more far apart you are from the people you love, the more it makes you realize that you shall appreciate their existence. Untuk ada dengan engkau dalam susah dan senang walaupun dipisahkan oleh jarak yang beribu batu itu bukan kerja yang senang. Serious, bukan senang.

Distance should not be the basis of ending a relationship. Distance should be defied and considered as a test to make the bond stronger more than ever. I know some part of it seems hard. But, as what I said, some things are worth a try.

Aku tahu, kadang kadang, or even. Most of the time, kalau dah berjauhan rasa ragu ragu tu selalu wujud menyetan dalam diri kita. Kadang kadang, nak control pun susah. Pasti ada juga sekali dua terlintas, 'jujur ke dia bila aku tiada'. Mempersoalkan benda tu tak salah. But, ada batasnya. Sebab, kalau kau sayang tapi tak ada kepercayaan,apa gunanya kan ? Trust plays an important part between two people who loves each other.

Bila kita tgh susah, orang yang jauh tu memang tak dapat membantu kita 100 percent all the way. Most of the time, kadang kadang ada dari segi mental. Untuk ada physically tu, jarang. But there's still ada yang sanggup merentas jauh jauh just to be with you in bad times. And kalau dah ada yang macamtu tapi tak reti appreciate juga, aku pun taktahu kata apa.

Some people find this hard, very hard. And there are times you feel fucked up all the way. But to be true, distance is just a little something in this relationship. Kalau benda yang tak berapa nak besar macam jarak jauh pun kau susah nak handle, apa tah lagi yang besar dan complicated. Think about it. Hidup ni, tak selamanya melekat. Ada juga kita berjauhan at times. Ajar lah diri tu untuk menahan rindu, kumpul rindu tu banyak banyak. Bila jumpa, rasa cinta tu macam makin membuak buak. Tak semua nya yang ada dekat indah di mata kita.

Long Distance Relationships. Some might end with a break up, and some might end marrying the love of their life. As for me, as what I've seen in my real life. My own brother who has been loving the same girl for 8 years, since highschool, to college seperated with something called distance, can never be a reason for them to end the relationship. At the end of the day, he married the love of his life. Now that's bliss.

Let me take it this way. If you're willing to take the risk, take it.

There are times that it's worth a try, or even if it doesn't end up the way you want it, make it as an experience in life. But trust me, if you can go through this problem called long-distance, there are so much more than you can bare with.

As for me, I've overcome all the long-distance relationship that I ever had. And all of it, was something to be remembered for. Something wonderful even if it has it's own lessons.

If there is tomorrow when we're not together. There is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart, I will always be with you.

R e p l a c e d .

2012-01-20T23:11:00.002+08:00

"You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Being replaced. Whether it's by your best friend, your boyfriend/girlfriend, or even your family. Seeing them happy with someone else slowly kills you inside. You watch them do the things you two used to do. While you're looking at old photographs and listening to old songs you used to listen to together, they're out there with someone new. Not you. When you walk past them, it's like they look right through you. Right through their past. Like you never meant anything at all, even though you were once everything to them. All you can think about is them. The memories. You two. You automatically hate the person who replaced you, but it's not their fault. You blame it all on yourself. Thinking back at how things used to be and saying "If I knew what I know now, I'd go back in time and change it all around." Sitting all alone in your room, crying your eyes out, wondering what you did wrong. Why can't you have them back? Why can't things go back to they way they used to be? It's the worst feeling in the entire world, and it especially hurts when you've come to realize that things will never ever be the same."

K .

Chances.

2012-01-17T20:45:00.001+08:00

Giving someone a second chance is like providing someone with another bullet after they missed shooting you at the first time.

When we love someone, we tend to forgive each and everytime they made a mistake or they hurt you. It's not that I'm saying it's wrong to forgive them and start over. The problem is, sometimes, people never learn.

I admit. We, as human beings were born with flaws. We're not perfect. We're not even close to perfect. Mostly, if they forgave you for all the hurtful things you've done towards them, maybe the only fact that matters is they still want you in their life no matter how much it hurts. And for that, you should be thankful and try not to repeat the same mistake over and over again.

But then again, some people will never learn. Ada yang masih repeat mistake yang sama, over and over again. Ambil kesempatan sebab ada orang, yang akan sentiasa maafkan segala salah silap dia sama ada kecil atau pun besar. Remember, the first time may be a mistake, but for the second, third, and more to come, is his/her choice.

Kadang kadang, bila dah bergaduh besar. Kalau mengadu, ada yang kata. " Give it up, he/she's not even worth it to be with." The problem is, some people find it easy to say such things, but when they're in the same phase and we said the same thing, they'll be like.. " I love him/her, and I can't afford to lose him/her."

One thing about me, is I don't find it easy to give up towards someone I love. I took risks on loving someone no matter how it takes. I don't brag about the good things I've done just to make them happy. I kept it all inside my heart, hoping that one day the one I love the most realizes all the efforts i've been pulling through just to make him happy.

You see.

Giving people a chance, isn't that bad. It proves that kau seorang yang pemaaf. Dan kau tak mudah menyerah kalah dalam sesuatu yang kau sayang. Sebab kau sendiri tahu, manusia buat kesilapan, even you yourself. Cuma kadang kadang, ada yang berbaloi untuk diberi peluang. Dan ada yang tak. Antara yang berbaloi atau tak, itu semua aku rasa kamu dah cukup besar untuk nilai. Cuma kadang kadang, hati kita yang degil untuk kata tak kan ? Sebab apa ? Sebab, dah sayang.

Kadang kadang, yang kita rasa susah nak kita lepaskan itu sebenarnya yang patut kita lepaskan. Memang rasa macam kalau sayang kenapa lepaskan. Sama juga persoalannya dalam kalau kau tak gembira, kau bersedih, kenapa kau masih merapuhkan diri engkau sedangkan engkau layak untuk dapat kebahagiaan ?

As what I said, some people deserve a chance. Semua orang nakkan peluang dalam hidup ni. Antara keluarga, pasangan, friendship. Semua nya ada peluang. It's just that ada yang reti menghargai peluang yang diberi, dan ada yang ambil kesempatan.

My main point is,

If they done you wrong, give them a chance.

But then again, if it's too much, realize your worth and start to walk away and live the life you supposed to live.

Dwell upon your own thoughts and fight your inner battles

2012-01-17T11:19:00.003+08:00

Sometimes it's better to have time for yourself. You really get to know who you are when you dwell upon your own thoughts and fight your inner battles.

Life is a journey, of ups and downs. And it's nothing without risks.

In life, I've faced obstacles that I can't even imagine myself going through it. But I said to myself, there's no point on giving up when the only option I have is to be strong and keep moving forward. The more I tried to avoid all the madness, the more it kills me seeing everything fall apart right in front of my eyes one by one.

Sometimes, I have these weird thoughts as if I don't even really know who I really am deep down inside. It's like there's something messy and complicated in me that I can't even figure it out. Tapi sebenarnya, makin banyak cabaran yang engkau tempuhi, makin kau akan kenal diri engkau siapa. Ya, aku tak sempurna. Aku memang bukan manusia yang sempurna. Aku buat kesilapan dan kadang kadang aku tak reti belajar pun dari kesilapan aku. Mungkin, itu kelemahan aku. Tapi, tidak bermaksud setiap kali aku jatuh, aku akan terus jatuh.

Manusia berubah. Dan andaikata satu hari aku berubah, aku doa yang aku berubah ke arah sesuatu yang lebih baik, yang tidak menjahanamkan aku. Itu harapan aku, yang aku sendiri masih tercari cari macam mana nak ke situ.

Aku tahu, dah lama aku menyepi. I took my own sweet time, dealing with all the mess inside my head. Walaupun hanya suku yang aku dapat selesaikan, ada lagi yang tergendala. Aku masih lagi mencuba. Siapa kata aku putus asa ? Aku ambil masa. Sebab, aku tak mahu buat keputusan terburu buru. Sometimes it ends in a disaster. And I can't afford another heart-throbbing sadness inside of me at this very particular moment.

Sebab tu aku ambil masa aku sendiri.

Biar aku fikir yang sebaik mungkin mana hala tuju aku. Dan cari jalan penyelesaian yang terbaik. I'm fighting my inner battles on my own. Sometimes it seems that I'm happy on the outside, but the truth is people never really know. The only one that knows how much pain and suffer youve been through in life is you. And for that, you can judge yourself. And you shall improve yourself to be someone better.

Foot note :

I'm back.

I'll be braver, I will always be my own savior.

2011-12-31T20:50:00.001+08:00

It's been a year. The last thing I remembered like the back of my mind was January, I was all messed up. Diam tak diam, dah setahun. How fast time flies. Hmm.

Year of 2011.

I admit, it was the most toughest year for me. For every heartbreak, every hardships and obstacles i've faced made me a stronger person deep inside. It's not that I'm demanding a better life ahead. I'm still thankful for every challenge god gave me. There's always a reason for everything that had happened. Up till now, there are still things I wish I knew the reason why..but maybe, just maybe, I don't need to know some of the truth about something. But whatever it is, god always knows best. He indeed knows what's best for me, every inch of me.

Here I am, 20 years old, standing still. Even if I have things on my mind, hurtful scars in my heart, dying thoughts deep inside my brain, I'm still here standing tall trying to figure out a way to survive with all my flaws and imperfections.

I've been drowned. Sometimes I wish I can give up and start over, forgetting everything that had happened. But then again, I know wishing all of those things, wont make me a stronger person day by day. That's why I chose to be fearless towards everything that hits me, even if it's killing me, I'm gonna strive.

I know, there are times we have these awful thoughts on our mind, telling us enough is enough, it feels like every inch of our body has given up to try our best because it's not working out. But put your hands close to your heart, and whisper to yourself, you can. You'll cry a thousand of tears, you'll feel useless at times, but you have to believe in yourself. That's how I taught myself through out the years to keep myself strong, even if there are times it's not helping me, but I keep believing in myself that things will get better someday.

Another year, a brand new year.

I hope to be a better person, a wiser person, and a stronger person again and again without any doubt at all. Aku tahu, banyak yang bakal aku tempuhi, yang bakal rapuhkan aku. Tapi ini janji aku terhadap diri aku sendiri, aku tak akan mengalah. Dan aku tak akan berhenti dari bangun dari segala yang menjatuhkan aku. Kerana aku percaya, yang aku boleh.

So here's to another year of

Change, heartbreaks, new friends, old friends, adventures, drama, obstacles, experience, knowledge, stupidity, chaos, fights, break ups, make ups, new dreams, new goals, accomplishments, new enemies, tears, laughters, and new love memories.

I don’t care why you’re leaving You’ll miss me when you’re gone

2011-12-21T22:31:00.000+08:00

I don’t know, where you’re going

Or when you’re coming home

I left the keys under the mat to our front door

For one more chance to hold you close

I don’t know, where you’re going

Just get your ass back home

No one hold me down like you do sweetheart

You keep doing that, I keep doing this

We’ll be alright in the end

Trust that

We put the us in trust, baby

Let’s go

I don’t care what you’re after

As long as I’m the one, no

I don’t care why you’re leaving

You’ll miss me when you’re gone

One of the worst thing in this world, is this ugly society.

2011-12-15T20:45:00.000+08:00

I'm not trying to bash anyone's blog or heck. But, there's just this one thing that disgusts me the most. I repeat, the most. I will not publish any links or whatever regarding this piece of crap. But, I just wanna spill out a few things.

It's sad, when our society nowadays prefer to bash people based on their appearance rather than what they truly are on the inside. It's like when you look at a profile picture on facebook, automatically you know how they roll and how a bitch or a jerk they tend to be. Believe it or not, that's what most people do nowadays.

Setting up a blog just to talk bad about people is just effing wrong. You posted pictures of them and you put bad comments on their appearance such as how they dressed up, how ugly they are, how thick or thin they are, how their legs look like crap, why aren't they white, why are they dark, how cool they dressed up but sadly they own an ugly face you can't even imagine.

And to be true, I was like....sorry but.. WHAT THE HELL ?!

What's wrong with our society nowadays. It's weird when some people nowadays are trying so hard to fit in, when they can just stand out and be themselves. What makes some of our people aren't confident towards themselves is because of this ugly society. Deal with it.

You post bad comments on people appearances.

You post bad comments on how badly they dressed up.

You post bad comments on how pathethic their parents are for having an ugly child.

And the shit goes on. and on. and on.

And the weird part is, manusia sekarang bukan membantu redakan. Makin menjadi jadikan. What's the point kalau engkau ada rupa yang extravaganza tapi hati kau, macam bangkai yang busuk yang orang tak sanggup nak dekat pun. It's like you don't own a proper life. What's your motive people ?

Are you too perfect to discriminate others ?

Do you think god made you so much better than them and you can hurt them. You're telling the whole world. Think about it. What if you're dealing with the same thing ? I hope you choke to death. Seriously.

Untuk apa rupa tu semua. Kekal ke akhir hayat ke ? Ada kau rasa rupa tu semua menjamin segalanya ? Ada kau rasa dengan rupa tu, dosa pahala kau kurang dan bertambah ? Ada kau rasa rupa tu boleh menjamin kan masa depan yang cerah ? Ada kau rasa rupa tu boleh buat kau jadi kawan yang baik ? Ada kau rasa rupa tu, memang segala galanya bagi kau ?

If you think it that way, than you're just one of those ugly society. And that is such a disappointment.

Grow up people. Just grow up.

No wonder most people nowadays are full of insecurities and they're like..i want that body i want those legs i want those boobs i want those thighs.

Kalau kau bangga dengan segala rupa kau, kau riak dengan rupa kau. Kau ingat, Allah tu maha adil tahu ? Dia boleh tarik rupa kau, dalam sekelip mata. Dan masa tu lah, engkau boleh tahu betapa bodoh dan hinanya jadi manusia yang hanya pentingkan rupa dari hati sendiri.

The thing is, You're not ugly. Society is.

The only way to have friends is to be one.

2011-12-13T20:45:00.003+08:00

Sometimes, when you're so far apart from your own family, you tend to love your friends, just like your own family. Just like, your own flesh and blood. But that will not make you love your family even lesser.

You see, friends are like a supporting character.

I know, most of our friendships don't stay for long. Unless you're still in kindergarten to believe that term of 'friends forever'. It's not that I don't believe in friendship, I believe.

But sometimes, friends can hurt you too. Life.

Some friends, come and go. Only true friends will stay. Not bestfriends or bff whatdeheck. It's true friends. It doesn't even matter how long you've known each other. The most important part is how deep you know each other. How many dark secrets of each other you've kept just between the two of you because you promise it lies between the two of you. How many laughter and tears and stupid silly little things you've fought about that brings you closer day by day.

My friends are like my supporting character. They hold a role in my life that I cherish to bits, besides my family. Some friends known you for years, and they're still with you. But some friends known you for years, but still have the guts to hurt you and be such a backstabbing piece of ass. Sorry, but this is just the truth. The older you grow, the more you know. And the wiser you'll get. Sometimes, you argue and things get rough. Some of them forgave each other's mistakes and continue being great friends, while some of them..just forget who you are and befriends with others. People change. That's why some friendships change too.

Some friends come and go. Some come and hurt you. Some come and put their trust in you. True friends are limited edition. If you want a true friend, you can start by being one.

Remember what I used to say ?

Bila aku bulan. Bintang bintang keliling aku bagaikan manusia yang hadir dalam hidup aku. Sekejap banyak,sekejapnya sikit. Itu umpama manusia yang datang dan pergi dalam hidup aku.

Forever and almost always,

2011-12-10T13:25:00.002+08:00

Did you ever do this, you think back on all the times you've had with someone and you just replay it in your head over and over again and you look for those first signs of trouble ?

So I throw up my fist, throw a punch in the air,

And accept the truth that sometimes life isn’t fair.

Yeah, I’ll send out a wish, yeah, I’ll send up a prayer

And finally someone will see how much I care

Jika Hari Ini Hari Terakhir Aku,

2011-12-09T21:00:00.000+08:00